We Die At Night

tumblr_mvjbfv9aIY1slvo0po1_500There are moments when we feel alone. However, no one ever feels more alone physically and emotionally than at the dead of the night when sleep escapes you and complete darkness covers you like a blanket with only the breathing and snores of others as your only companion. To feel alone is like that very moment where even though you are surrounded by people, you sit there by yourself with no one to go to and no light to lead you as you tip toe your way through the dark.

I despise that emotion. I hate this very moment where I’m feeling it crawl over my skin like a cold, slithering bug as it whispers that yes, you are truly alone while reveling in the fact that it had succeeded in making me fall into that black hellish hole it dwells in. It’s happy that it was able to drag me into the trenches it lives in that is filled with nothing but dirt and pain.

However, I want to escape. Somehow I wish to grasp the warmth that’s fading away. But I still can’t help but think of how I never felt so alone till now…completely utterly alone. And that was the moment when I had failed to bring myself back and the way out seeped through my fingers like water as if it had never existed. At that second I was truly too far into the trenches to get out anymore.

I was truly gone fin that second for at night we die. Our thoughts wander to the farthest corners of our minds that we never ventured. It’s when darkness consumes us with no light for comfort. Each night I die. I sleep like I never had opened my eyes before and never will open them in the future. At night for a while…we die.



    • True! They’re not necessarily always related. For now though those two words mean the same thing for me because my depression makes me feel lonely especially when I’m alone but I’m starting to teach myself how to not feel lonely even if I’m alone because I have my family and many others that may not be physically with me every second throughout the day but care a great deal for me. 🙂

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      • Yea. And we all have this moment you know. Self-pitying, not belonging, I don’t matter blah blah blah. I’ve been through these days and I don’t it will stop. I stay quiet all throughout and I think too much before sleeping. At least when I wake up I feel much better than I did.

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